Wednesday, October 23, 2013
Friday, October 11, 2013
In the last few days of March 2001 you came to stay with me as we buried our favorite uncle; you brought your daughter and your man. Your daughter was just as I imagined, precious and beautiful, a reflection of you. This man you brought in to my home was “different”, he seemed to be a man of many requests (iron my shirt, get my drink or plate, etc…), but I thought nothing of it at the time. We stayed up all night talking and reminiscing about our hectic past, I mean we talked about everything; the good and the bad.
We reconnected in a way that only first cousins can understand. I felt so relieved that I was not the only one affected by the things we saw and was not allowed to discuss. Your presence held a certain freedom; which came from realizing I hadn’t made our past all up in my head. We vowed that day, as we shared what would be our last hug, we would not let time and distance become an obstacle for us ever again.
Over the next six months, we would talk here and there and I learned quickly how easy it was to reconnect with you as an adult. It wasn’t long after I planned a trip down to Maryland; I still can’t place words to my anticipation. The trip was planned for Thursday, November 29th and I knew it was going to be a quick trip to attend a concert, see you and be home for work the next morning.
Read the rest at The Radiant Sunshine
Wednesday, October 9, 2013
Wednesday, October 2, 2013
Tuesday, October 1, 2013
After a night of laughter and good times with good people I was feeling good, laughing in my head about jokes said over dinner and feeling renewed after a particular rough week of work. Then I looked at you in the passenger’s seat; stone faced and straight-eyed, like the last four hours never happened. Sure, you laughed a little with our friends, even told a joke or two, but once we were alone, we were back to our norm. Yeah, I keep forgetting we’re not in love anymore.
Of course I love you and I think you still love me, but we haven’t been in love in quite a while. We haven’t found the strength to dissolve our relationship and walk away from one another neither. Instead, we pose for pictures with smiles remembered from a lifetime ago and kiss one another like strangers. Yet somehow, people think we’re still going strong. I feel like I’m holding you hostage, keeping you away from the happiness you deserve, while I’m serving out a sentence for the previous cats to have broken your heart. I know I’m not without my shit and at times I’m bad, but not as bad as Eric Benet. Most of the time you treat me like I don’t exist, except when you want to yell at me, the rest of the time you stare through me.
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