Project Philosophy

So you’re a philosopher? Yes, I think very deeply.

I spent just under thirty minutes in what had to be the closest thing to hell I’ve ever experienced. I was trapped between a brother that never met a sentence he didn’t want to speak and a sound check. It all started when he intruded on my world as I exchanged BBM’s with a friend and asked, “What you doing? Texting?” He was three people away from me, but bothered that I wasn’t paying attention as he held court with a rant about the state of today’s music.

Read the rest at Project Duh...

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The Calm Before the Storm

The sun is too bright, the trees too still. I'm up right on time and glad to be. I must be sick, no I'm not sick. I just spent the last two weeks recovering, the last four days immersed in beautiful weather and better music. Why am I not smiling? Oh yeah, in about 35 minutes life changes for me. About one hundred teenagers will converge on my little corner of the world and nothing will be more important than what they want at the time. Yeah, that's right, Mr. Farmer is back.

Today is the first day of the Fall 2010 semester and Superman must be in the building to answer questions, solve problems, put out fires, give fashion tips, relationship advice and be a life coach. I place many hats over my bald heads from time to time, but I enjoy what I do. Scratch that, I love what I do. There's a fulfillment that I can't explain when one of my students starts to put the pieces together and heads towards the rest of their life. Sure, there are disappointments (many of them), but there are plenty of successes as well (not enough), but neither outweigh the other and each semester I'm back to try again. Besides…they make for great comic relief.

My babies are back!

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Take This, Take That

Today is the day fellas. The day that you realize just how unsexy you are to your lady. Yes, many of you have known this for quite some time, but for those of you of the delusional cut, you will find out in about 5, 4,3,2,1.

Today marks the release of the film Takers, yeah, that movie. The heist movie with the eye candy ensemble cast designed to make brothers feel like they come up just a little bit short. The film stars Idris Elba, Michael Ealy, Chris Brown, and T.I. It doesn't end there; the ladies even seem to have eyes for the White guys, Hayden Christensen and Paul Walker. This is a no-win situation for us.

While we go into the theatre hoping that we see a film with plenty of action that has at least 1/10 the cleverness of Ocean's Eleven, they are going for the foreplay. This is a make or break weekend for you fellas, not like a Tyler Perry film, but you have to decide what you gonna do? I'm not sure you want to let her see this with her girls, but you have to be strong enough to endure her sidebar comments through the most important dialogue of the film as she tells no one in particular how sexy Idris Elba is with his accent.

So, swallow your pride, get $60 from the ATM and hope that Zoe Saldana has a sex scene…see you at the concession stand!

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Straight from the Horse’s Mouth

Someone actually came to Wendy Williams' defense the other day after my "I'm Disappointed in America: Daytime Television" post. I guess I've been asleep for a few years, but it seems as if Wendy Williams has become a source of empowerment and escapism for some. Silly of me. Here I was thinking that she was just some loudmouth that fed off of the public's lust for gossip and mindless entertainment.

Her hustle and staying power is top-notch, but she's made her way on the backs of talented individuals who try do live a little thing called life. I called her brand of ignorance "particular" because it's not that Povich or Springer ignorance, but it's not the stuff that pushes the people forward. Since she left the "Top 8 at 8" on Kiss-FM, she's been seemingly obsessed with a lifestyle out of her reach and a cache of stars that she neither had comparable talent or access to. Frankly, people her listeners didn't give a damn about. But that's what she wanted and that's what she's able to do now on her television show, talk about mainstream celebrities and wish that the A-list makes their way to her space on the air. To each its own…

Also, she is very empowering to people who may be bigger than everyone else, taller, fatter, etc. Wendy is not afraid to be herself and in doing so, she makes other people feel comfortable with themselves.

Are we talking about the same Wendy Williams? I'm writing about the superficial chick that's been cut, pulled, lipoed, augmented, wears big weaves and is as shallow as a kiddie pool. Anyone that's altered their body and face in the ways she has hates themselves. I'm sorry, this woman is hard to look at, she's a shorter weave away from looking like Michael Jackson, guess that makes her LaToya. But I suppose that we're not just starved for entertainment these days, but we're famished in the area of positive role models.

I suppose she had a plus size model or two on once or twice, but what we are looking at is not a woman that is comfortable in her own skin. Maybe growin up at the Jersey shore and going to school in New England has warped her sense of identity, but she will not be high on my list of positive imagery for little Black girls, which is sad, because she's on television throughout the day (once on BET of course).

But I'm just a hater right?

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Come Hell or 100 Million Dollars

"I went through hell"

That's what Elin Woods or Elin Nordegren, whatever the huzzy wants to call herself told People magazine in her first interview since the ordeal with now ex-husband Tiger Woods broke out after all the leftovers from Thanksgiving dinner were gone. She claims she was completely oblivious to Tiger's indiscretions, just lived all hunky dory and spent his money while he tricked off $30, $40,000 with those sack chasers here and there. Trick please! You knew he was getting his swerve on with a golf course full of chicks, but as long as your momma, friends and the world didn't know, it didn't matter because you had access to nearly a billion dollar empire.

But whatever went down that night changed everything, has destroyed Tiger's game, but left Elin with at least $100 million. My guess is that one of his bust-it babies wanted him to pour cranberry sauce all over her and Elin intercepted the message or Tiger fell asleep without locking his phone (tighten up playa), but a golf club through a car window was probably preceded by a right cross. She denies both, but you and I know what's going on!

Tiger's taking a beating publicly and rightfully so, but Elin has been pristine through all of this, but someone has to ask, what drove Tiger outside of his marriage? We don't know what type of woman she is. She could be the biggest nag in the world. Verbally abusive. Unsupportive. Manipulative. And for all we know, she was denying Tiger the one thing he apparently needs to keep his stroke tight…keeping his stroke tight! The man has gone to rehab and come out a completely changed man on the links, he appears timid, afraid, more house cat than a Tiger.

He's struggling and she's jet-setting, shopping, leaving big tips. Lest not forget she was changing diapers for some nondescript golfer when Tiger figured her for a freak and wifed out. Now he's a couple stack short, with two kids, a bad putter (no pun intended) and a decreased libido. What such hell? A little embarrassment, but who would notice her getting a pedicure? She has two kids by a man with more money than he can spend and she's getting a huge amount because he got caught creepin'. I'd trade a slice of that hell for the pie in the sky people chase in a New York minute!

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The Curious Case of Fantasia Barrino

I was really concerned about Fantasia when I found out she tried to take herself out. That concern turned to pity when I began to look back over her life. However, that pity has morphed into shaking my damn head at this stupid ass girl! Two weeks off a suicide attempt and she's on Good Morning America and VH1 in the same day and George Lopez the next night. Hmmm, seems as if ol' girl had an album released Tuesday. The timing seems a bit odd to me, but it's got people talking and if they talk, there's a chance they will purchase. Cha ching!

Two weeks ago your peoples had you in the shower trying to keep you alive and now you're everywhere? Midway through her talk with Robin Roberts I had an epiphany. I said to myself, "Self, this heifer faking! She's desperate and trying to sell these albums before she's singing jingles!" By the time she got to VH1, I knew it was a full-blown publicity stunt and it had gone beyond desperation, it's just sad. I took three sleeping pills a week ago and I'm still napping whenever I recline, she OD'd and has gone on a media tour. When was the last time you've seen someone attempt to end their life and hit the TV before you got paid again?

She has been through so much in her life and I believe much of it has gone untreated, that an act like this wouldn't be out of the realm of the possibility, because the victim role fits her. She's been raped, abused, shoeless and reading on a third grade level, not to mention that I cringe when she speaks, because not only does she speak like a child, she sounds like a child. Girl you're way too old to be talking like a runaway slave. I'm not sure how sorry America was feeling for Negros the season she was "America Idol", but the girl can't sing and the sooner we admit that she's no Jennifer Hudson, the sooner we can celebrate some good music like Leela James' album.

What are the odds that she lands on Oprah's couch in the next couple of weeks? There was so much to talk about leading into her taking a few Tylenol PM's. There's the foreclosure, the stalled career, the married man and the alleged sex tape. Oh yeah, maybe that's what had her thinking of the end? Either way, real or make believe, it's not gonna end well for Tasia. The girl has issues and it's sad when her mama isn't equipped to help her, but the naiveté of the buying public is enabling this farce.

Say it ain't so Fantasia…

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In Search of...Gabrielle Union (Actress)

Can someone tell me the last movie Gabrielle Union was in? I'll wait while you try to figure out if The Perfect Holiday was before Deliver Us from Eva. She had a part in Cadillac Records two years ago and then a few episodes on TV shows I don't think many people are watching. However, we see her courtside at the NBA All-Star Game, living it up on South Beach, when BET reruns Black movies all weekend and on gossip sites. And if Siohvaughn Wade had her way, we would've seen her court. Dwayne Wade's ex-wife was suing her for her relationship with her estranged baller for what she deemed improper shows of affection in front of her children. Yeah homegirl was reaching, but that's another story.

It seems Gabrielle thinks she's hit the lottery of life and doesn't have to work anymore (ask LisaRaye about that) or the fall of Black Hollywood is really affecting her. Either way, she doesn't seem to be fretting much as her man collared two new teammates with the same effectiveness as this cougar landed him. She's a full ten years older than the man Shaq called "Flash" and her resume is full of bad movies prior to when her and D-Wade started knocking boots. The internets were abuzz with rumors of her South Beach exploits before she broke up an unhappy home, so maybe that's the reason directors and film studios haven't been blowing up her Blackberry.

If I could get a word to her I'd tell her to get on someone's casting couch ASAP, because there's going to be an influx of groupies on South Beach that are damn near 20 years younger than her because there's a new King in town this year and someone is going to have to clean up all of that collateral damage LeBron leaves on Collins. Somebody get Tyler Perry on the line…

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Four Women

I guess this is part of the reason they say I hate women…

It's one of those days when a few things just really had to get out of me. Today they came out in the form of four posts about four women that have been on my mind over the last 48 hours. If I had not run out of time, the title would've been "Eight Women", because there are four more women that have turned my stomach this week. Trust me, I'm gonna get with them shortly and probably piss a few more women off in the process. But for now, Gabrielle Union, Elin Nordegren, Fantasia and Wendy Williams were on my radar.

I'ma holla at a few other trifling women in a matter of days…

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Ballad for a Fallen Soldier

The theme song to “The Wire” plays in the key of life on my mental piano as I look at what they call life. I’m not sure if you’ve been watching the story that’s not on your nightly news, but the world is going one way and many of the young folks that look like you and I are going the other. Libraries are closing and no one’s hiring, but gangs are recruiting and hopelessness is setting in. All the while talking heads are babbling about mosques, marriages and millionaires, while our children are going nowhere fast.

We can blame them individually, blame the parents, blame the teacher, blame the preacher, hell, blame it on the boogie; but the responsibility has to be shared and acknowledged if any progress is expected to be made. But how do we make progress when standardized tests are the gatekeepers to graduation and libraries are closing by the city? So, the blame is quickly shuffled to the school for not doing their jobs and teaching the babies. Yet, the parents have to share that blame for not reinforcing the skills being taught in the classroom.

I guess it’s hard to check homework when you’re out working two jobs to make ends meet. Yeah there’s some of that going on, but there’s many more mommies not around and daddies long gone, leaving these kids to navigate the world on their own. So we can’t really blame them for playing the hands their dealt…though sometimes you gotta gamble and change your cards. However, that’s where this generation seemingly differs; they seem to lack the basic skills for survival in the rugged terrain of the ghetto.

No ambition, no hustle. No classes, no jobs. No dreams, no hope, just a pocket full of anguish and no idea of how to get to the rest world. I can’t imagine facing the world with that on my chest every day and the rest of my life seeming so far away. Looking at your life thinking, “Damn, I’ma be a failure, surrounded by thugs, drugs and drug paraphernalia.” With limited options, even less resources and no stimulus plan to heal the hood, these angry young souls loiter on boulevards and make enough scratch to smoke a little weed and drink a little Hennessey, but somehow guns are readily accessible and they’re figuring out how to use them. 2Pac was dead on; these fools are busting shots like they lost their minds, like 25 to life never crossed their minds. When you live an empty existence, what difference does it make if you die or spend the rest of your life in prison?

So on the block they stand, head on a swivel, looking for whatever may come. Whether that’s a few dollars, the police, a female, a rival crew or a working man just finishing the day. However, that last person virtually goes unnoticed, because he’s not a threat or an asset and his life makes little sense out there where positive imagery is nonexistent. These are the children of crack of rap, but neither is raising them to be men. Where rappers like Jay-Z could at least serve as a rag to riches model for them, they shun him for grittier rhymesayers that lack his sophistication and continued maturation. They can’t relate to Jay-Z’s music because their exposure is so limited that the things he’s rapping about are completely over their head, therefore out of the realm of their possibilities. Their aspirations even come with a cutoff score.

The world keeps moving. They alternate standing still on the sidewalk or a porch or just in their own way. I see them, you see them, but everyone ignores them. So, blame them individually, blame the parents, blame the teacher, blame the preacher, but blame me, yourself, a system that creates the bleakness and the hate that despair produced.These are the casualties of the war on Urban America, but they won’t be naming no buildings after them or building any memorials for these fallen soldiers.

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The Hump Day Song of the Week: OutKast ft. Goodie Mob "Git Up, Git Out"

One of my favorites songs...

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Fresh Out of the Frying Pan into the Fire

So I picked today to return to work. I figured Hump Day should be simple enough to begin my transition back into the work force. It's situated far enough from the madness of a Monday and thisclose to the freedom Friday ensures, that's if I decide to go in the rest of the week. I'm still a ways from being 100%, but at 75% - 80%, I'm better than 99.9% of folks. Yeah I got a big…ego! But yall knew this already. So, my Polo shirt is crisp, Stan Smith's are laced up and my bag is packed…but I can seem to peel myself away from the couch, we'll try this again another day.

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I’m Disappointed in America: Daytime Television

I don't see how people do it. How the unemployed and those folks who choose not to work stay home day after day is beyond me. Daytime television alone is enough to make me want to get up, get out and get something. Of course those "SVU" marathons on Tuesday and the random "House" marathon has kept a brother glued to the couch on more than one occasion, but day after day after day, this will kill me. It seems like every station is following the same format; talk show. Court show. Maury, Jerry Springer or Wendy Williams (at times all three). Talk show. Court show. Maury, Jerry Springer or Wendy Williams (at times all three).

It seems as if that old daytime staple the soap opera is being phased out in favor of this type of programming. A couple of the all-time favorites have gone the way of the west and it seems as if those remaining are on their last legs. I can't remember the last time I heard someone saying they couldn't wait to see what happened on "Days of Our Lives". It is definitely time for some new blood, seriously, how long is Erica Kane gonna play musical husbands with Jackson and the rest of the gang.

But a new soap opera is like saying new 50 Cent these days, no one is checking for it. We've reached a low point in our viewing tastes (as said on this page time and time again), because we'd rather watch Maury go through DNA tests than anything with a bit of creativity. Where do they find these people who are so unsure about the paternity of their children that they have to seek Maury Povich's assistance? You really want to broadcast to the world that you're having sex with 13 guys and they got to skeet, skeet, skeet for like on the house? Have we no shame people? But I guess it's no different than the trailer trash we've been watching get it in on Jerry Springer all of these years, are these new episodes that are airing? Wendy Williams has parlayed her brand of ignorance into a television show that airs four or five times a day. I can't believe they put her plastic self on TV that many times; it should be against some sort of FCC regulation to look at someone so disgusted with herself that many times a day.

Remember back in the day there was "The People's Court", and then came "Divorce Court"? Now there's "Street Court", some cockamamie show in which people meet with a mediator and hash out their details in alleys, offices, a bar, wherever. But this comes on after twelve other courts shows that range from an angry Italian woman to no-nonsense brothers and some old White lady. All of their courts and others are filled with people hashing out petty differences for a shot at 15 seconds of fame. But you watch and I skim over and millions of dollars are generated, because millions of people are fixated on watching others live. I'm taking my ass back to work!

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Act III: Here Comes the Bad Guy Again

Act I
When the calendar flipped I decided that I was going to make wholesale changes to my lifestyle, a real commitment to being a better man and I was three weeks in when my appendix decided to accelerate the process.

Act II
Emergency surgery followed by a three week recovery and the path was set. A few weeks later my heart went a little crazy and the changes weren't mere suggestions by me, but directives from my cardiologist. Gone was the caffeine, chocolate, rice, potatoes, fried foods, red meat & pork (from my other doctor) and the Level was taken off of my mantle.

A few months of that and no real change in my health, though I felt better, lost a few pounds, there were still symptoms that led me and the doctor to believe that heart failure was imminent. So, for the second time this year I went under the knife.

Act III
No blockages, a little plaque in my femoral artery, more alterations to my diet, another prescription (that makes 4), more tests and a plug in my groin, but I'm still here. So I figured while I was here, I would do what I do best, talk my sh*t! Yeah, I've been taking it pretty easy the last few months, really enjoying life, flirting with the possibilities it offers and not paying attention to the rest of the world like I'd previously done.

To be honest, most of my posts for the last few years have come under the influence of vodka, so I believed that I had been without my muse or maybe it was when I looked around I saw so many people doing exactly what I was doing, I even saw a brother with the same exact title for a similar piece.

Then the big homie said "Do what you do, can't nobody do what you do like you." I agree I said, my one-of-a-kind self, then I wrote the "What We Talk About When We Talk About Love" series, went under the knife and realized that the world is my muse, so I'm headed back into the world and I'm back on my bullsh*t!

As always, everyone's fair game, especially those women out there choosing trifling dudes, then saying all dudes are trifling. You're on deck…

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Didn’t You Almost Have it All?

Just a few years ago it seemed like Eva Mendes was destined to become an A-List actress. She had star turns opposite Denzel Washington and Will Smith, top billing alongside Mark Wahlberg and Joaquin Phoenix in We Own the Night, climbed Maxim's list of hot women and then she was off the scene. What happened? My guess is cocaine is a helluva drug! I'm not sure cocaine was her drug of choice, but something led her to rehab in January of 2008 after a yearlong battle and her career has yet to recover.

After a successful stint in rehab she's back in The Other Guys with Will Ferrell and Wahlberg, but I didn't see her in the trailers and haven't heard much of her appearance, so I'm led to believe the role is a bit small. Bad enough work for minority actresses is slim, there's no room for anyone to go out getting hooked on stuff and thinking the phone will immediately start ringing once you're clean. Trust me, Eva found actresses like Sofia Vegara or Zoe Saldana were not holding her place when she stepped out of line to get herself together and now has to scratch, claw and maybe a few other things to get consistent, good work in Hollywood again.

We've seen plenty of people bounce back from addiction, touching kids, bad plastic surgery, so my money is on Eva to rebound like Dennis Rodman…I just hope not with the Worm. It seems like she's trying to rebuild her profile with a prank plugging a "sex tape" that made it's rounds through the internet earlier this month, but that may be what she needs to bring the light back to her, a sex tape! Hell, it's worked for Montana Fishburne!

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Am I Disappointed in America: The Lottery Ticket

I'm not sure how I feel about The Lottery Ticket. I know it looks stupid and I know I've been critical of Ice Cube recently, but it's good to see a movie with a Black ensemble cast and Tyler Perry's name not stamped all across it. The commercial says it's Friday for a new generation, which if related to hip-hop of then and now, I can see the comparison. Cube has come a long way since Friday was released and Hollywood has regressed in that time as well, so the period in which the Friday franchise was born has come and gone.

Now, we have these happy-go-lucky films that are released every once in a while, that are supposed to remind us of the days gone by. Seriously, this movie stars Bow Wow, am I really supposed to go to the movies with your cousins and 'em to see it tonight? I do hope folks go see it this weekend though, a strong showing will show there's an audience beyond your favorite movie man and hopefully create a lane for the rebirth of Black Hollywood. Yeah, I'm wishing on a star or two and I'm not disappointed in America today either, must be the meds…Burn Hollywood Burn (I'm good)!

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A Woman's Eye for the Fashionable Guy

While I rest and prepare to get back to business Monday, I figured I'd showcase a young lady with an eye for fashion that can help a few of your fellas get your fits right. Ms. Kashè Monique is my sister’s partner at The Learned Society and a unique soul that specializes in the fine arts. Here’s her latest post on “Celeb Men’s Style”:

Distinction. Style. Prestige…

Fashion & Style

Kashé Monique

As a stylist, and most importantly, as a female, there are a few DO’s and DON’Ts I look for when it comes to men’s fashion and style. The one thing that draws me into men’s fashion is its classiness. From the bad boy to the alternative rocker, I love them all! As long as these men wear the items they choose well and with poise, it’s as good as GOLD!

For your enjoyment, I have selected my top celebrity males with a great fashion sense and wear their clothes with character and confidence. Along with the good comes the bad, so I picked my least favorite styled celebrity male and offered an alternative for that particular look.

♦

First up, are the REFINED tailored clean cut lines and suits. For this category, my leading man is singer, songwriter, pianist, and artist John Legend. No matter what function he attends he is always structured in a fine tailored suit. It’s always refreshing to see a man that knows the proper etiquette while dressing up for a day at the office or black tie affair.

Read the rest of the article HERE

Follow her on Twitter @DstnctStylPrstg

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Finding Stillwater: A Summer’s Journey to Good Music

My sister doesn't realize that no matter what she does, not only am I proud of her, but I'm watching as well. Here's a post from her website thelearnedsociety.com...

Finding Stillwater: A Summer’s Journey to Good Music

The story behind the quest…



The greatest memories of my childhood stars ME, as the little sister who would sit on my kitchen floor in front of our refrigerator after school and listen to my older brother play his music outside of his door. I never could quite make out what was being said, but whatever it was, I remember being quickly drawn to it. Something vibrating through the cracks under his closed door. Bass that shook the house when our parents weren’t home. Verses that painted themselves on the walls of our humble two-family house.

I had the privilege of having a big brother whose adolescence took place in the heart of the 90’s, one of hip-hop’s golden eras. On any given day, I’d be engulfed in soulful sounds off Reasonable Doubt, thug poetry off All Eyez on Me, and street jazz from The Low End Theory. Before I mastered the mechanics of my right and left, I knew The 10 Crack Commandments better than your neighborhood street pharmacist, had Luchini dreams, and was down with the Wu like I was straight out of Shaolin.


Secretly.



Read the rest here...The Learned Society
And follow The Learned Society on Twitter @learnedsociety

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You're a Big Girl Now...

I just wanted to take this time to say Happy Birthday to my sister Tranae! Today is her 23rd birthday and if I know her, she's working before she goes out to a concert or something this evening. I wish I was there to celebrate with you...enjoy!

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The Hump Day Song of the Week: Loose Ends "Hanging on the String" and a Bonus Song...

I'm gonna give you a 2 for 1 this week...

Loose Ends "Hanging on a String (Contemplating)"


And John Legend's "I Love You Love"

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What We Talk About When We Talk About Love: I’m Not Your Plaything

Don't open another door before closing the first

Old folks say it, so it sounds right. It's also applicable to a situation many people find themselves square in the middle of. Letting go and moving on is hard, but is made damn near impossible when there's so much love still involved or enough time hasn't elapsed to heal the wounds. But life doesn't stop, your heart continues to beat and occasionally you find yourself in a situation that grows out of your control. There are a few of us that seem like magnets for women in these situations and end up feeling like a Loose Ends song…hanging on a string.

The men in these situations become collateral damage because of the unresolved nature of the previous relationships. I really doubt there's anything intentional, just a ball of confusion that tends to bounce into the yards of unsuspecting men, who pick it up to play and eventually home to meet mama. It's one of those things that happens when your mind is telling you one thing, your heart the opposite and your body is doing what the hell it wants to do! So some poor sap is on the other side trying to dance to your rhythm, while holding on to that string for dear life.

The new fools hold on, seeing what they want to see, while old fools let go after a while and plain' ol fools never grab a hold of the rope. I can't tell you which of the fools is correct, but a wise man once told me that love and happiness can make you do right and make you do wrong. Wait a minute, that was Al Green, but he was right. It's hard to let go of something that feels so right (and so good) even though you know it's wrong, regardless of how much you must appear to be a fool on the periphery. Your friends don't understand, hell, you don't understand half the time, but you keep holding on like Simply Red.

There's no blame to be placed because we like what we like, but after a passage of time, a resolution is needed. As the old folks say, there comes a time when you must shit or get off the pot. We can't go back in time, but if there's something so strong that you can't let go, while he's dangling for dear life on that string, you may need to deal with that and allow him a chance to place his feet on solid ground. Relationships are hard enough as is, but they are really hard when one person has plans for the future and your thoughts are stuck in the past, pretty much impossible. At some point the doubt takes over, you question if you’re good enough, it must be something if she’s still contemplating and you changing your grip on that string.

But it's all in the game I suppose, you win some, lose more, but you live to play again…as long as you don't hang yourself from that rope.

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In Search of…Freddie Jackson

I got a $1,000* for anyone who can get a line on Freddie Jackson for me. You remember Freddie Jackson right? He was hot in the mid-80's with "Rock Me Tonight", "You Are My Lady", "Love is Just a Touch Away", "Jam Tonight", "I Don't Want to Lose Your Love" and "Tasty Love". That was an impressive string of hits, he was hot…then he wasn't. I don't even remember the decline (blame it on Bobby Brown), but Freddie was well, Freddie was dead (on the radio at least).

Dude had the cameo appearance in King of New York, that little sound at the beginning of each side of his tape a line that has stood the test of time, "When it's right, it's right, it's alright/…Keep it there, right there, ooh yeah". Damn, we use our talent up and spit them out. I mean Freddie Jackson can't get any burn on KISS-FM nowadays? He can't get a tour?

Someone find his e-mail, Twitter, Facebook, BBM, church or the spot he's working for me, I'm spearheading the resurrection of Freddie Jackson's career, maybe we can get him a duet with Trey Songz or get Nicki Minaj and Drizzy Drake to spit hot 16's on his track. Who am I kidding; let's get him featured at The Sugar Bar first…







*The $1000 reward will be paid via an annuity of 10 years and 1000 weeks of my choice...

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What We Talk about When We Talk about Love: No Man’s Land

There's one sentence that men never want to hear from a woman, it's four words that hit you square in the gut, "Let's just be friends". Understand that we have friends, don't need new ones, men don't pick up new friends along the way all willy nilly. We've had the same friends since messed up haircuts and Cross Colours outfits, the last thing we need is to break a new friend in on our idiosyncrasies, especially a woman. Me and my friends drink and cuss together, have dinner at the strip club and bury secrets, are you ready for that type of commitment?

Some say it's impossible for a man and a woman to just be friends, but I disagree with that because many of my closest friends are women, but the circumstances from which those relationships stem from are far different. There's that percentage of platonic relationships that have always been, the guy and the girl that have been cool since 3^rd grade and become like brother and sister. There's those that meet along the way, maybe on the job or you get cool at the bar, but the vibe stays on that level. There are even the few that have situations with orgins in a friendship, then he started to dig her, thought she was cute, didn't steal, so she must've been "The One". They play with the idea and decide that they're better off as friends.

However, when you meet at a defensive driving class and you spend the next six months having dinner, long conversations, walks and trips to the zoo, then you drop that "Let's just be friends" shit, you're lucky I don't kill you. Girl, I'm not trying to be your friend, I wanna be your lover, I wanna be the only one that makes you come running. I'm not sure where in a woman's mind that makes sense, but I'm here to let you know that if a man truly loves you with all of his heart, he can't just be your friend, not for five or six years at least.

No man in his right mind sets out to land in the friend zone, it's really not a place we're comfortable being. I know we lie and say we're cool with it, but we're trying to show you how understanding and sensitive to your emotions and needs we can be. But it's all bullshit; we don't want to be friends no more than we want to get our prostates examined. Even the possibility of a few "fringe benefits" isn't enough to keep us around that long if we're really trying to be with you. That sort of cheapens the situation and this time around, not our idea of fun, especially when we reach the point when you begin to date and we're not on your dance card.

What kind of new fool subjects himself to that sort of pain? I like ya and I want ya, but you want to be friends, so I'm going go with that and act like I don't love you? Girl please! That's not the way it works, we're in this for all of you at that level, not the half you're willing to give. I don't know a man strong enough to watch the woman he loves fall in love with another man or go through the motions with other guys and act like he doesn't give a damn.

I was out for a woman, I don't need another friend, my friends are eating buffalo wings and having a fantasy football draft while I've just finished suffering through Eat Pray Love with you, so pardon my back on that friend tip.

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Stir Crazy

I'm on day 5 of being laid up and this is not my idea of fun. It seems as if I can't do any one thing for too long, because it aggravates the area where I'm tender. I lay, stand, walk, elevate, sit and after ten minutes I need to seek comfort in another position. However, all of that's minor in comparison to the boredom I've been dealing with throughout the week. I've read, watched movies, slept twenty minutes here and there, spent entire days on Twitter and sunk to an all-time low yesterday when I attempted to have a Tyler Perry movie marathon.

Yeah you read correctly, I attempted to spend a beautiful Saturday watching movies that I detest. It all stemmed from a conversation I had on Twitter Friday evening, but it was definitely short-lived and misguided. I fumbled my way through Diary of a Mad Black Woman, but after a bowl of Frosted Flakes, I found myself napping through Madea's Family Reunion and was forced to put in Cooley High to save my soul. But that's what it's come down to for me, trying to entertain myself by any means necessary, even if it means by watching something that I know I'm not entertained by. Comcast almost won the battle over my cable this week and with at least another week of this, I'm pretty sure they will gain a stronghold in our battle---man cannot live on broadcast TV alone.

Someone was kind enough to track down Stephanie Edwards for me, turns out homegirl was a arrested a few months back for getting into a fight in the park and is appearing in some kind of show in Savannah. Thank you, I am on the first thing smoking as soon as I can support my weight for longer than a half hour. Well, back to my high-quality chillin', I'm just hoping not to get low enough where going to see Eat Pray Love sounds like a good idea, now excuse me as I return to waiting on the Sunshine to return…

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I’m Disappointed in America: The Expendables

Hollywood is on a roll with bad movies! There was that Step Up The Expendables, another movie that should've never been made. A movie about has been mercenaries, starring mostly has been actors is getting the big budget treatment. This mess is getting out of control, where are the creative minds in Hollywood. Sylvester Stallone actually convinced someone to put money behind this film, I need a sit down with those folks, because I have some ideas.

Stallone is 82, back on the 'roids and apparently needs either cash or the spotlight. The film costars Jason Statham, Jet Li, Eric Roberts, Mickey Rourke, Randy Couture, Terry Crews and "Stone Cold" Steve Austin. Wait…Randy Couture, Terry Crews and "Stone Cold" Steve Austin? I guess Jean-Claude Van Dam, Wesley Snipes and Mel Gibson were a little busy. Even Arnold Schwarzenegger has a cameo, like he doesn't have a state to continue running into the ground. As a matter of fact, why are people tripping off Wyclef, like California didn't elect The Terminator as governor?!? But I digress, if this movie makes more than $5 million, we have hit an all-time low and Tyler Perry might as well round up his band of merry men for Meet the Browns 2!

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In Search of…Stephanie Edwards

I've never watched an entire season of "American Idol", but I did manage to get a few episodes under my belt when Stephanie Edwards was a contestant during season 6. I think I first saw her sing "Dangerously in Love" and watched until she was eliminated a few weeks later. It would be an understatement to say that I was disappointed in America for not registering enough votes for this pretty young thang!

She's been M.I.A. since A.I. and I'm sending out an S.O.S. for her, because I think the girl has... talent. Maybe she went back to school, maybe she's working or still singing, I just hope she doesn't have a pair of clear heels on right now. Stephanie if you just happen to read this, holla at me…

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What We Talk About When We Talk About Love: Bitter Nigga

Most fellas are gonna play it cool when you break up with them, but if it's at no fault of his own, he's gonna perform. Trust me; I've seen it in action. Blindside a brother and he goes all Denzel in Training Day, King Kong ain't got nothing on him! If he's really into you, not only do you have some problems, but so do the next seven women he dates. We know how to hold a grudge and if we've made ourselves vulnerable, put our hearts on the line and really wanted to settle in and kick it with you, the notion of having that feeling you gave him is as welcome as a 60-year-old man from the south giving up pork!

I told you we hold on to the one that got away, but the one that pushes us away stays just as long and occupies a place of love and hate at the same time. That's not a place you want to be ladies, because when a man has contempt for you, damn! I'm just saying, we start wishing all kinds of things on you, the worst kind of unhappiness we can dream of. I know they say Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. But Earth knows nothing like a man with a broken heart! Marsha Ambrosius has nothing on a bitter Nigga! We sit around thinking of things to happen to you like…

I hope he cheats on you with a chick that used to @#$% ballers/And you get sick every time my name is brought up/Hope she works at your job and they get married next year/Have a couple kids with gray eyes and good hair/I know it may sound bitter/Yes I'm a little bitter/Yes I'm a bitter Nigga/Cuz I'm no longer with 'cha

I hipped yall to the game of chicks with BBS, but Bitter Nigga is hard to spot. He creeps below the radar until you refuse his drink or advances, then the "B-word" comes flying out. While that word isn't acceptable, understand that he isn't talking to you, he's still mad at her! So every woman he dates until he meets "the one" or the next one to break his heart is treated in that manner. He's on the low so good that he's dating one of you right now, but as soon as you begin a conversation with "We need to talk…" he flips out on you, because he's been waiting for you to say those words since you said hello. Now he's cursing your mama, you dog, your mechanic and everyone known to you and you were just trying to tell him that you spilled something on his Cowboy jersey.

Some of you have peered in a little closer because you're waiting for me to give more clues to how to spot this dude, because you think you may be dating a bitter Nigga. Sorry for ya, I'm not gonna do all the work for you, you need to talk to your man and if he's extremely disgruntled about Jay-Z and Beyoncè or Ashford and Simpson, hell Jesse and Angie, there's a good chance you're keeping time with Bitter Nigga!

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What Were You Thinking: Take Two of These and Call Me in the Morning

I feel like this Fantasia mess is all my fault. Well, not mine personally, but I metaphorically represent all of the heartless people that have mocked her in the moments leading up to her swallowing a bottle of pills. I represent everyone that was utterly disgusted by the idea of her nakedness leaking on the internet and finding its way to a website I cruise through a few times a day. At the same time, I'm part of that population that was totally confused by her taking the reality show route to resurrect her dormant career. Also, I'm in the large minority of people who really can't stand to her screaming passed off as singing. To go a step further, I'm still pissed that Jennifer Hudson didn't win season 3 of "American Idol". However, all of this pales to my disappointment that this grown ass woman needs to be hooked on phonics.

But none of my personal feelings go into what almost happened Monday night when Fantasia nearly took her own life. Her team can call It what they want, but there is nothing accidental about an overdose. We've spent our entire life taking two Tylenol, maybe three if we have a migraine, anything over that is just ridiculous. The story they're putting out is that she mixed aspirin and a sleep aid, why not just take a Tylenol PM? It all sounds fishy for someone who's seen the best days of her career and is caught up in the middle of a love triangle in which her man's wife is calling her out and threatening to release a sex tape.

I hope whatever demons are eating away at Fantasia are exorcised swiftly, so I can get back to business as usual with her, mad that she won the show, not liking her music, doing my best to avoid looking at her (naked or otherwise). Get well soon Fantasia!

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What We Talk About When We Talk About Love: I Think About Her Every Once in a While

Ladies, have you ever looked at a guy and thought to yourself that he isn't there with you right now? There's a great chance that he wasn't, he's in his head thinking of her smile, her laugh, her smell, he's thinking of her. Who is she? She's the one that got away, the one he never had the chance with, the one he just couldn't get up the nerve to step to and say, "Hello. What's up? How are you?" We all have that one. The woman that will silently drive us crazy, even when we're with you and you're driving us crazy.

It's nothing personal against you, we understand that in most cases we weren't your first…or second choice, but the choice was made. However, through the years there's been a woman or two that exceeded every expectation we've set for a woman, but just as quick as she appeared she was gone, taking with her our ability to dream, to love unconditionally, that forever shit. In many cases it isn't gone forever, but there's a large space of time in which we're totally consumed with the idea of her and each woman we meet in the interim is simply in the way as we await her return.

But she never returns. She's just a thought, an "I wonder where she is" or a kick in your ass for not doing things differently. In the worst cases, she's a Google or Facebook search away, which is kinda creepy, but makes complete sense in your mind. In severe cases, she's the reason we can't commit to a woman that loves our funky asses for who we are. Ladies, you're right when you think there's someone one, there's always someone else, maybe not physically, but mentally she's in the middle of your relationship. In time you'll destroy the myth, you'll remind him that she's gone and you're here, but are you willing to put in the time? Are you willing to sit through his far away gazes and the way he just doesn't seem to want to be in tune with your feelings and emotions?

Sonny said you're allowed three great women in your lifetime, but many men would testify that we've gotten stuck on one. She's the invisible opponent you all are fighting against in pursuit of our never-ending love. By now you're wondering how do you defeat the myth? She's never totally vanquished, but her memory can be set on the shelf if you're just being yourself, providing him with everything he's looking for in a woman and a little sugar on top. Do that and he'll be happy and you'll be happy, just know that he's gonna think about her every once in a while…

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The Hump Day Song of the Week: Gnarls Barkley "Who's Gonna Save My Soul Now"

Sometimes art speaks so true to life...this is really what guys want to say to women during this type of conversation!

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What We Talk About When We Talk About Love: Bang the Drum Slowly

Somewhere out there right now there's a brother contemplating his end. He's not considering suicide; he's looking at his bank account and looking back over his life debating if he should buy her "the ring". Not every man agonizes over the decision, but it's a huge step that many of us have to be mentally prepared for far ahead of the emotional and physical acts of a lifetime commitment. The problem is, we move to the beat of a different drum, which is not in concert with the rhythm most of you sway to.

For women, marriage is the beginning of a beautiful fairy tale, filled with the stuff dreams are made of. For most men, marriage is the end to the freedom they've worked so hard to achieve and filled with the nightmares shared on many a bar stool. I have no experience with marriage and I only speak for 83% of the male population, but marriage isn't necessarily in our plans when we first meet you. Actually, the last thing we're thinking about when we first meet you is marriage. It's way down the list, below:

1. I hope she doesn't have kids
2. I hope she has a nice ass
3. Please let this girl be smart
4. Don't let this one steal
5. Damn I'm hungry
6. Does she have a man
7. If she doesn't give me her number, I can find her on Facebook
8. I hope she doesn't ask me to buy her a drink…man I hate it when they do that sh*t!

Marriage is not high on our list of priorities, it's one of those "if it happens, it happens things", but we're not looking to choose a preacher before choosing where to have our first date. Which is totally contrary to the softer sex, you guys are trying to decide if a brother should wear a cummerbund or vest, while deciding Adidas or Steve Madden's, we're just not on the same page. Slow down baby! It takes time for me to decide if I'm ready to give up the freedom of watching SportsCenter five consecutive hours and having carbs only meals for a lifetime of holy matrimony with you. Our compatibility has to be tested from the restaurant to the movie theater to the living room to the bedroom to the checking accounts. I can't marry you because I think we'll have cute kids or you'll look good in pictures, but for tax breaks I'll jump the broom with Aunt Kizzy!

I know quite a few people that have walked down the aisle and ran like hell not too long afterwards because the idea of being married beats the reality of being married. We've gotten too lazy as a culture to put the work into a successful marriage, so it's much easier to bail on your husband or wife than to lay the cards on the table and work at reaffirming your vows. What's the use in getting married if we're getting divorced at the first sign of turbulence? We could've had a white party and saved a gang of money if that's the case.

I got a partner that's been in 12 weddings over the years (yes 12), been a best man a few times, but has yet to take that one step over to the hot spot because he's not ready. It's that simple, we get married when we're ready, when you're pregnant or you've played Jason Bourne and given us an ultimatum. It seems as if you guys are always ready, I know women that go shopping for dresses and they are single as hell! Single like, "Damn girl, when was the last time you had a man?", but they up in David's Bridal every few months trying to will it to be.

I've heard one too many women say they just want to be loved right before making a decision to marry some shiftless Negro, thinking the want of love was enough to sustain the need of having a man to strengthen, support, love and honor you. I'm not sure on what planet that's an even exchange, but that trade is being made more often than it should. Boo Boo slow up the tempo, learn to love yourself honestly, find a man you can love earnestly, take your time then make it right religiously, so I won't be talking about you individually.

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What We Talk About When We Talk About Love: Scenes from a First Date

Have you ever had the occasion to sit next to two people on their first date? Their conversation makes great fodder over your food, because you get to listen to what could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship or the beginning of the end to a disastrous outing for two people that should've never shared minutes together over a meal and adult beverages. If you've been looking for a gauge to determine where you are as a person, go on a date with someone new. You'll find out if you're dull, intriguing, what type of signals you're throwing out there and if you have what it takes for a long-term relationship.

I told you earlier this year that the first date should be informative, not invasive; you don't need to disclose everything that you think, just show that you think. Oftentimes we believe that the first date is our one shot to impress upon the opposite sex that you should get with this, but all you truly need to do is leave a bit of impression and mystery that will lead to subsequent dates. There is such a thing as too much information and more times than not, women are guilty of this infraction. There are some things that you shouldn't disclose on the first date, like only having a couch and a bed in your place, because now my focus has shifted. I no longer want to get to know you; I want to get the drawls!

You've managed to change our friendly outing into a mission, with little need for reconnaissance work, because you gave up the goods after one apple martini and now I'm going to you three more, so I can get your goods. The same way that men talk their way out of sex, women talk their way into sex, because it doesn't take much to flip the switch in our heads and get our mojo working. We go from 0 to 60 in 2.2 seconds. Yes, it takes that long from thinking, "Damn, I can introduce her to my mom" to "I want to make her call me Daddy!"

Next thing you know you're left with a wet spot, wondering why he doesn't call you. If you're serious about dating, be generic, have an air of mystery around you that will keep us coming back for more, which will keep us intrigued in getting to know you. If you are unsure what type of impression you're making on a guy, peep out how fast he's eating. If he's tearing through his food and barely looking up at you, he's either trying to get the hell away from you because you told him you want to get married next week or trying to speed through his meal to get to your air mattress, his futon or the Red Roof Inn! There's also the possibility that he just doesn't have good table manners, in that case, you should just step off now.

The first date should leave something to the imagination, leave reason for a second, third, fourth date and phone calls or just time spent between those dates. However, it's hard to get there when you're playing "This is Your Life" over Caesar salad or letting him know that you're a good time girl way too soon. On your next first date slow your roll, dispense information proportionally, get to know him beyond what he does and his smile and see if he calls you for another date…if not, you may need to take a look in the mirror.

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Kevin Hart as 50 Tyson!

A little something to get you through the 2:30 wall!

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What We Talk About When We Talk About Love

Put any group of guys together and for at least five minutes, the conversation will turn to women. Yeah, that's it, five minutes. We don't spend a whole lot of time examining the intricacies of you all, trying to give each other dating advice, consoling broken hearts or talking about how jacked up women are, we have bigger fish to fry…like our fantasy football drafts. But when the conversation does happen to turn to women or relationships, it's usually one guy who's going through it that needs to vent, because that's what we do, we vent. We get the nonsense off of our chest, take a few jokes and move on, none of claim to be experts and none of us want to hear expert opinions.

However, break that group down to a two-piece and you may get a conversation that lasts about twenty minutes that ranges from meeting a new woman to how this current chick is driving him up the walls. Even under these circumstances, advice is kept to a minimum, even responses are measured. That's because what we talk about when we talk about love doesn't have to stretch from the length of the drive from New York to Baltimore, we can get it all out in one line that sums it all up, "Man, what you gonna do?".

"Man, what you gonna do?" is the question that fits every situation when men are talking about relationships; from meeting someone new to taking your relationship to the next level, an untimely pregnancy to that moment when she has you at your wits end, "Man, what you gonna do?" leaves a brother to ruminate on his predicament and also reminds him that the onus is on his shoulders to figure out what his next move should be.

We don't need a search party or a hen session to find answers; we can work it all out during a commercial break. I figured that I'll take the next few days to talk about different aspects of relationships strictly from a man's point of view. I'm gonna have a little fun, may hit a sore spots, but I'm gonna keep it funky for ya…

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What’s a Man to do when His Heart Can’t Take No More?

He goes and gets it fixed…

Today is one of those days that you both, look forward to and dread at the same time, but I had a little talk with Jesus and he said I had too much unfinished business to step off right now. I've been looking for some closure or at least answers to issues I've had surrounding my heart for the last couple of years and increasingly in the last few months. That day has finally arrived and I'm on my way to have a procedure or two done that will hopefully bring some comfort to my chest cavity and ensure a long life of being Teef. I plan to be on the mend for a few days, but I think I'm put together a few things to hold you over until I return on the other side of this thing.

You let somebody tell it, I'm going to finally fix my broken heart, I kinda like that. I'm on a bit of a fast, so I'm hungry and thirsty, only thing I can have to drink is the water I swallow while brushing my teeth. I would say I'm nervous, but someone may pinch me, but I am finally ready to get some progress on this thing.

I'll be extremely low in the coming days, no phone calls, texts, BBMs, Facebook, tweets, e-mails or drive-bys as I'll be getting my thing together at an undisclosed location. Thank you in advance for the well wishes and prayers, I need them all, but I'm gonna throw up these two fingers and tip on out the door. I'll see ya when I see ya.

Teef

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The Not-So Friendly Skies

Did you see the story of the Jet Blue flight attendant that spazzed on the intercom, grabbed a few Budweiser's, slid down the emergency chute and ran through the terminal like OJ? Talk about being fed up? It seems like dude has had it up to ^here with rude passengers and couldn't take it anymore. Could you imagine being on that plane when all of this went down? I know folks thought it was some terrorist action going down. Airport security definitely gets an F for reaction time, dude wasn't caught until he was at his crib…how the hell are they gonna stop a terror suspect?

Read the article here

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The Week That Was: What Were You Thinking?

Last week was a crazy week. A brother went wild in Connecticut, a group of kids drowned in a Louisiana river, Bill Cosby died, Kanye West premiered a new video, Alicia Keys is honeymooning with Queen Latifah and rocking a bikini at five months pregnant, Montana Fishburne decided that she wanted to Kim Kardashian her way up like Marsha Ambrosius says in her new song, Naomi Campbell put her right her hand about some "blood diamonds", Wyclef is running for president of Haiti, Iran's president says a he's been threatened, then the next day he's "attacked", Russia is on fire, Pakistan is under water and Camden is closing their entire library system and I was just trying to celebrate my birthday…

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The Insomniacs’ Diary: Bourne Edition

There are certain movies that you should never start watching after 11pm, The Bourne Identity is definitely one of them, because next thing you know you're up watching the subsequent movies in the trilogy. When you finally finish around 4am, you realize that on the other side of sunrise is a day that offers no rest, but you're up watching car chases and shootouts. It's mornings like these that makes you want to push a snooze button on an entire day, though it's improbable, it's not impossible.

Folks across the country were excited that football was back as the Dallas Cowboys and Cincinnati Bengals kicked off the 2010 preseason last night. However, preseason football is not a good watch, because the starters generally play no more than one, maybe two series. I guess it was enough to satisfy the blood lust of thirsty NFL fans who tore themselves away from "True Blood" to watch the exhibition game last night. Speaking of "True Blood", what's the big deal? I'm tired of vampires and werewolves and all of that stuff!

Aside from all of that, I got bigger fish to fry these days, the bills don't stop and beans don't fry on the grill, guess I'll try to get at least two hours of sleep before I pack two weeks of work into 8 hours…

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I’m Disappointed in America: Step Up 3D

First of all, when was there a Step Up 2? Next, who thought this was a good idea to turn into a 3D movie? Ain't no Leroy in this movie? I've never seen Step Up, don't desire to see it, but I would love to speak to the geniuses who put this crap out? Had I written this Friday I would've said that no one wanted to see this movie, but I now know that $15.5 million dollars worth of tickets were sold. Now, factor in the inflated cost of 3D tickets and I'm sure far less folks saw this movie than Salt did over the weekend, but I guess teenage White girls needed something to do since Justin Beiber wasn't in their town.

This movie wasn't made for me, but its commercials played during programming that I watch and there's a huge banner hanging in the mall, so I couldn't ignore it, even though I did ignore it. So, which one of you saw it? Were the Darren Henson dance moves coming right at you? I'm starting to think that B2K should reunite so we can get You Got Served in 3D, that would be the joint!

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Made it Through Another 3-65, Can’t Ask for Nothing Much More

I'm not sure if I'm more excited that my direct deposit went through early or the fact that today is August 5^th. Let me stop…today just happens to be my 32^nd birthday and that trumps chump change any day of the week, especially payday. 32 is more stepping stone than milestone, but a stone nonetheless. The last year has brought about many changes, good and bad, but I'm here to try again this year. And I'm thankful for that opportunity to do so.

I'm also thankful for the moments my mom and dad spent together to make my one of a kind self. Though I wish she was here, I'm thankful for all of the sacrifices my mom made throughout my life. I'm thankful for Delia and Lillian for raising me. I'm thankful that my grandfather took his time to show me what a man does. i'm thankful my sister is strong enough to navigate the world on her own. I'm thankful for a family that enveloped me with nothing but love and encouragement, friends that have always supported and pushed me. I'm thankful for the friendship that bends, but never breaks.

I'm thankful that I get up and do something that I love each day and find fulfillment in it. I'm thankful for the doctor that performed the emergency appendectomy that allowed me to make it  to today and I'm thankful in advance for the doctor handling the procedure on my heart Tuesday that'll take me to 33 and beyond.

I'm thankful for Dr. Jerry Buss and Mitch Kupchak for bringing Phil Jackson back and surrounding Kobe Bryant with enough talent to win back-to-back NBA titles (hi haters!). I'm thankful that A-Rod finally played up to part of his $250 million contract and helped the Bronx Bombers win #27. I'm thankful that Coach K is a genius and took Duke to another title. Hmmm, my favorite teams all won championships this past year…I only associate with greatness!

I'm thankful that Erykah Badu and Maxwell released albums within the same year and that 50 Cent's album flopped. I'm thankful that Bobby Brown is clean…Mike Tyson too. I'm thankful for the good literature I've read and great films I've seen. I'm thankful for "Tremè" for season three of "The Boondocks". I'm thankful that my DVD collection allows me to give Comcast the finger and rock without cable for a few months.

I'm thankful for each of you that continue to read these words I put together on a daily basis. I'm thankful for Lee Bailey, Fatin Dantzler, Elon White, and Alissa Griffith for providing me with a platform to do something I enjoy. I'm thankful for the performers of life that give me so much to talk about; I'm not sure what I would do without you. Thankful for Facebook and Twitter. I'm thankful for my 4^th Blackberry, I'm not sure what I'll do withoutit.

I'm thankful for those that have walked into my life and even thankful for those that have walked out of it. Whether you left with a smile, tears or calling me a selfish MF, I'm thankful for the time we had, but all things come to an end…good and bad.

I'm thankful that God saw fit to allow me another year to straighten up and fly right, Teef in progress. I'm thankful for that person that walked into my hospital room on January 23^rd and hasn't left my side since. But most of all I'm thankful to be who I am at this place and time, I wouldn't want to be anyone or anywhere else, but in these Stan Smith Adidas about to face the world on my 32^nd birthday.

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The Hump Day Song of the Week: Jeff Redd "You Called and Told Me"

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No Future in Your Frontin'

I’m late. I know that I’m late. I couldn’t let this go any further, ha to get it off my chest, but what the hell is a lace front wig? I know some of you are wondering how I don’t know wat a lace front is, but I shouldn’t know what a lace front is, nor should I see what’s beneath front. But I didn’t know and I do see, so I couldn’t hold my peace any longer. But after seeing one of my student’s hairline all jacked up and 45 minutes on Google and I had a good idea of the madness going around. You have to understand that the women in my life don’t do extensions, weaves, wigs or even microbraids; I’m not a fan of none of it, so it doesn’t get worn. I’m a strict believer of doing the best with what you have. If you have long hair do it, if you have short hair, you better work it!

Back to the subject at hand, to be honest, I’m not sure how women are wearing these joints. They look absolutely foolish, a hot damn mess is more like it, but yall are trying to look good. I’m not sure how good you look when you look like you unzipped your hair and your face fell out, but yall are going for that Tyra or Beyonce look. Let’s be clear, that big lion’s mane hair never looks good and only makes a bit of sense when you’re performing. If you’re at the bar…slow down baby! I’m not sure what a good lace front looks like, because the hairline on them all looks so artificial to me just seems like something that shouldn’t be worn. I can’t understand why you can’t make an appointment with the Dominicans to get your doobie tightened up, roll your hair up at night, keep a brush cut, go natural, rock Anita Baker style, but do something better than looking like a damn fool.

Yall go to work with these things on your head? I’m not talking about Walmart or the mall; I’m speaking about a regular 9-5 and sit in meetings with your hairline looking like a US map? With the glue evident, just tacky! I can’t speak for the White guys that love the blonde hair and blue eyes, but I’d like to apologize for every brother that made you think you had to drop a few extra pounds on your shoulder to feel beautiful. Black women wearing wigs goes back a long way and the game morphed into weaves for a stretch, but has not reverted to wigs and I can’t believe that women under 40 are rocking these joints. Then again, according to some of you, I don’t understand or like women, but I do know one thing, ain’t no future for Teef and a woman rocking a lace front.

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Stereotype of a Black Male Misunderstood

I was dreaming when I wrote this, forgive me if it goes astray

But when I woke up this morning, I didn't know it would be your judgment day

Thursday you were a phone call, Friday a question, by Saturday you were the reason behind a fistful of tears

And right now I'm wondering why you're no longer here

No facts reported, no word on the street

Just the result of what happens when misfortune and dreams meet

You grew up too fast, lived too hard and now you're gone too soon

But they say God makes no mistakes, so this is his Will I'm too assume

So I'll deal with the loss, deal with the pain and try to avoid the guilt and blame

I wasn't trying to change you, I just wanted to give you some game

But you were always gonna be you

So real, so true, but that's what bosses do

Indeed you were rare, with a heart as pure as water

A mind that knew no borders

I'm gonna miss your philosophy

Gonna miss your honesty

Gonna miss the way you made everyone laugh

I'm gonna miss the future you'll never have

I’m gonna miss watching you being a man around the ladies

Saw the article in the paper and thought, “Damn, one of my babies!”

A book with a false cover, everything wasn't what it seemed

They didn't know your intelligence, had no idea you were on the road to your dreams

Deferred, hope lost on the street, the muted wisher

Thursday you were a phone call, Friday a question, by Saturday your name floated through the air like a whisper

And I prayed that God spared your soul on Sunday…

I was dreaming when I wrote this, forgive me if it went astray.

 

 

 

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